sol.ace_r

As you go on living, a thought sometimes crosses your mind.
“What exactly is it that makes me endure another day like this?”
It feels as though you could say the answer easily, yet the moment you open your mouth, no words come out.
A reason for living,
is like flowing water: when you try to grasp it, it slips away, and when you let it be, it somehow comes to rest beside you.

I used to think there had to be something grand.
Someone’s goal or passion, a dream that must be achieved at all costs.
But after some time passed, I realized that those aren’t things you can carry with you every day.
There are days when you have no motivation for anything, and days when simply opening your eyes feels exhausting.
And yet, strangely enough, people wake up again the next day and head somewhere once more.

When you think about it, the reason for living isn’t difficult or far away.
A fragment of sunlight you meet in the morning, a scent that briefly brushes past, the sound of someone’s laughter that suddenly reaches your ear.
Such small things seem to whisper that today is still okay.
In the end, it may be because of these moments that we keep moving forward, little by little, as if sliding along.

Some say it’s because of other people, and some say it’s because of themselves.
But to be honest, most days we live for very simple reasons.
Because we need to eat, because there’s something to do tomorrow, because it doesn’t quite feel right to die today.
They’re reasons that sound a bit plain, but it’s precisely that ordinariness that holds life up.

Sometimes, the time of those who are searching for their reason to live feels more natural than that of those who claim to know it clearly.
It changes a little every day; on some days it grows faint, and on others it unexpectedly deepens.
Like the amount you breathe in and out shifting slightly from day to day.

These days, this is how I think about it.
Searching for a reason to live is simply a way of living.
There is no right answer, and perhaps it’s fine even if you never find one for your entire life.
What matters is the fact that one very small piece of a reason has brought me to this moment today.

A reason for living doesn’t have to be grand.
Someone’s name, a time you love, a small expectation that suddenly comes to mind, a fragment of a heart that doesn’t want to end just yet.

That single fragment is enough to endure today.